I think I finally have mastered the art of cake making thanks to "naked" style cake trends. Also, our youngest is SIXTEEN!
Oh how the years go by.
You see, we are not your normal party animals.
Back in our early family days, funds were tough. The one time I did a party for my daughters, we chose to do a combined party (my February baby, and my March twins). All three at once.
Honestly, the sourness of big birthday celebrations has nothing to do with celebrating all three together back in 2008, rather my issue was the outcome. I was left with a giant mess from our guests and the return wasn't really worth it. My youngest was two and the twins were three. And if you ask them now, they don't remember a single moment of it.
I splurged on their party then, though we could hardly afford to. But that wasn't the issue.
I had invited my on-post neighbor friends. And then they invited others; and them, others...before I knew it, a party of five adults and maybe a total of twelve kids combined became a mega house party that I never expected.
Cake was mashed in my carpet. One person brought confetti poppers, and I swear, that shit is likely still embedded in areas somewhere in that townhouse. It was like sand. Gets in every crevice, even your buttcrack isn't off limits. Though we didn't drink much back then (priorities), the sole two bottles of liquor disappeared from my cabinet. I caught one kid eating Kraft singles out of my fridge. Screen door managed to break. My bathroom was destroyed. Wall dents. The list goes on.
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| This was just the beginning. Later, I had no time to take pictures as I had to monitor full grown adults in my home and ALL 25 of their kids. |
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| Proof of the confetti virus: A gift that keeps giving |
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| I've had some wild hairstyles, folks |
My patience with parties after that: gone.
That was back in 2008.
And I have not looked back since.
Since then, we have only done close knit friend/family parties, if you want to categorize them as such. But because our family moves so often, we don't always make close friends immediately. So some 'parties' are just the six of us, celebrating one of our own. Others may have a few folks that we know through army life and have known for some time. But never ever have I thrown a gargantuan party since 2008, and in my defense, I didn't throw one then. It just turned out that way.
Here's the deal:
My kids know that birthday parties cost money. And you and I know that the majority of that money is basically spent on guest enjoyment: Favors, food, desserts, experience, venue clean-up, etc.,.
Instead of having a huge party where I spend hundreds on the actual "party" part, we put that money back into our kids by NOT having a party.
No party = my child gets the party money
Each and every time we've given them a choice (since 2008), they have chose the money! Even before they knew what money really was, or at least the value of a dollar.
BUT, we still have a minimal celebration, in some way, shape or form.
Today is our youngest child's 16th birthday!
I spent close to $40 to make it special, pretty, and exciting for her, and more than that, Snapchat/Instagram worthy for her accounts (let's not lie, kids in this generation want those ooh & ahh pictures on their social).
In my head, I had already baked the cake. I had a vision, but had no clue if it'd come to fruition as I imagined it would because by default, I am not great at cake decorating.
Decorations were similar. The vision was there. We always stick to decorating the dining area for birthdays, but I am in a new house, and this 16th birthday is the first in it!
I knew she'd like pinks and golds/silver. This child is my girly girl out of the three daughters I have.
So to the Dollar Tree I went.
I picked out some random items, situating them in my head as I strolled the aisle. BTW, Dollar Tree now charges $1.25 per item! What in the fresh hell? A dollar 25 store?
Anyway, here is the take away:
- Three gold/rose gold dot banner things: $3.75
- 1 pack Iridescent confetti balloons: $1.25
- 2 packs Pink paper pom-poms: $2.50
At Walmart, I spent this:
- Cake mix X 3 : $4.50
- Cake frosting X 1: $1.60
- Pearl candies X 1: $1.97
- Pink balloons: 97 cents
- Gold balloons: 97 cents
- Bouquet of roses: $9.97
- Rose pink edible glitter: 97 cents
- White/shimmer edible glitter: $1.98
- Fishing line: $2.08
- Gold candles: 97 cents
Amazon:
- Metal, rose gold "Sweet Sixteen" topper $5.99
My total:
Roughly $39.50
To be fair, I already had the "extras": Eggs and oil for cake. The cake pans, the cake smoother thingy. The decorative cake stand. The dining table and chairs... you get the point.
For just under $40, I think I did a pretty good job at pretty!
I decorated and baked while she was at school. She was so enamored with it all when she came home that she sat at the table forever, taking photos and vibing in the presence of her special birthday decorations.
And honestly, I was obsessed with the way the cake turned out. WAY better than I thought I could do.
She wanted simple, so I went to Pinterest and checked out "basic bitch" cakes. I do fancy the rustic looking naked cakes. They are elegant without extravagance, plus they don't have loads of nasty frosting that everyone hates.
And lemme tell ya, a naked cake is SO MUCH easier.
You really can't fudge it up.
I baked the cake parts. Took three boxes of Betty Crocker French Vanilla with Pudding mix with my 9" non-stick Calphalon cake pans. This is because I filled them halfway for height and wanted three layers of cake. One box equaled one layer.
*I ADORE ALL THINGS CALPHALON. I could be their biggest spokesperson. It's my go-to cookware brand for everything. Every pot or pan in this house is Calphalon. Imagine my excitement when I learned they had a 3-in-1 combo (convection, microwave, and air fryer) microwave last month at Target. Snatched it in a heartbeat with zero reviews read. It's amazeballs, btw. Still love it!*
I completely let the cakes cool. I put some saran/plastic wrap over each as it cooled so they wouldn't lose moisture.
Once cooled, I popped them out one by one; stacking them on to the cake stand. As each came out of the pan, I sliced the rounded tops off, very carefully, with a sharp AF knife. I did NOT do layers of frostings in-between. We are not frosting people, y'all. If you want it, go for it!
At this point, I marveled at my leaning tower of cake. Made a few adjustments, and went for the gold with my one tub of store bought frosting.
I have made frosting from scratch before, but perfecting a buttercream for me has always been difficult. Sometimes way too sweet, sometimes not the right consistency. I just opted for the whipped, cheapo white frosting this time around to save time and heartache...and tooth cavities.
Using my cake smoother tool thing, I slapped frosting on the sides and began to smooth it out. It did look too heavy in certain areas, but I eventually turned the cake plate as I smoothed, focusing on the heavier areas to give it that nice German schmear, or thin layer of white, where you can see cake through the frosting.
For the top, I planned on a chocolate Ganache drip look, but that didn't exactly work when I realized I was missing heavy cream. Oops.
So I added a layer of my leftover frosting on the top and filled in all bald spots with the edible glitter. Added some candy pearls after that, et voila!
To garnish the cake, I snipped two roses & some baby's breath from the bouquet and stuck them in where I saw fit. Added the cake topper from Amazon and those Walmart candles, and we had a cake!
For decorating the room:
I passed out blowing up balloons.
Just kidding.
But kind of.
I used some teeny tiny hair rubber bands from my bathroom stash to tie the balloon buttholes together. I apologize, but there isn't a good word for that part of a balloon's anatomy...
From there, I used fishing line to tie a knot around the gathered bootyholes, then used push-pins from the junk drawer, knotted the other end around the pin, and shoved them into the ceiling. The dot garland was hung by tape.
I initially wanted to hang the pink pom-poms, but thought it'd be too much, so they stayed on the table.
The "Happy Birthday" banner is recycled from a previous birthday, but I slapped that on the wall with tape, too. After adding some candy, the gift bag, and setting the cake on the table, we had a bonafide, insta worthy, pretty party ready to happen!
We ate dinner and sang Happy Birthday. She blew out the candles and thanked us for another birthday well-celebrated. She was even excited to compare photos with me after (she convinced her sister to take pics for her on her iPhone). She loved it.
We never needed huge parties, because we never enforced them or made them seem required to our children. We've found other ways to make them feel special.
People ask myself and my kids all of the time if we regret not doing 'traditional' birthday parties, and the answer is no. My children don't really know any different. And with the constant changing of duty stations, it takes a bit to get to know peers at school anyway.
There's something special about making birthdays about the actual person and not the all out carnival shit-shows they sometimes turn into. Let it be said now, each of my kids will have a badass 21st birthday...in Vegas, but I can wait awhile. Birthdays come too fast as it is, and I'm in no rush for them to grow up.
Not in the least bit.
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