Decisions, decisions. When the army actually gives you a choice.

MIND BLOWN.

Back in early November (2016), my husband got into contact with a Sergeant Major he worked and deployed with in Fort Campbell. The Sergeant Major was now located in a place we wanted to be: South Carolina.

We've all met that someone that says "Hey bro, if you ever need anything let me know", and this dude was one of those guys. 

So, in November, my husband reached out to him and asked if he could help pull our family to Shaw AFB in South Carolina. At the time, the Sergeant Major was in Kuwait on a short deployment, but said he'd do what he could and try to get us requisitioned for Shaw AFB, ASAP.

Time passed. And it continued to pass.

My dreams of living in South Carolina, close to beaches, trees with Spanish moss, southern food and culture began to fade. I stopped looking at realtor.com, in fear that I was becoming too attached to the idea of something I couldn't have. But I crossed my fingers that it'd all work out in some crazy way.

Days before Christmas block leave, my husband reached out to him again, via email. We waited throughout Christmas leave, hoping he'd answer. He didn't.

During the first week of January, my husband and I got to talking about options. There weren't many.

We had some 'okay' and some pretty shitty options on the list of places that had slots open for our PCS/DEROS time frame. If you've read my previous blog posts, you know what they were.

But, after hashing out the nitty gritty details of what we both wanted and required, we made the gamble to just leave it up to the army. My husband really didn't want to pursue drill or instructor slots, and we knew that he could be DA selected if we chose nothing. But we chose to roll with it and see what would happen.

About a week after my husband returned to work (back from Christmas leave), he came home giddy as all hell, revealing that we had been requisitioned for Fort Riley, Kansas. As I mentioned before, this duty station was NEVER on the list of possibilities, and was completely off our radar. It also wasn't on our "fuck no" list.

We were good with it. We are happy with it.

Within a week of that email, the requisition became an on orders assignment.

Skip ahead to March.

Here we are, mapping out our soon to be new duty station in Kansas. We've already attended a LEVY brief, I have a list of 19 houses we plan to look at, if not sold by the time we arrive. I've read school reviews, looked up after-school activities, checked for my favorite stores, restaurants, and even received an enrollment packet for Kansas State University. 

We. Are. Ready.

But imagine our surprise when my husband went into work last Wednesday, and sees an email from the Sergeant Major.

Basically the email says that Shaw AFB is currently at 400% for my husband's line of work (meaning they have way more chiefs than Indians), but by August of this year, they'll need anyone they can get. The Sergeant Major basically said:

"Yo bro, I know you're on your way to Ft Riley, but if you want, I can MAKE Shaw AFB, South Carolina happen. I'll do all of the work to get you here, just say 'green light' and it's done".

I had no words when my husband explained this to me. I was happy, yet pissed. Not at the guy, but at the situation.

So last Friday, my husband gives me the ultimatum and the power to decide. He doesn't care which place we choose, he's just happy not to be headed to the trail (drill) or assigned to an instructor position. He knows that its important for me to finish school and important for our family unit to be somewhere that we can all love.

I immediately jumped online and re-researched everything about the Sumter, SC area; making comparisons to Junction City/Manhattan, KS. I REALLY wanted to reason with switching our destination to the place I originally wanted.

I called my sister, who doesn't fully understand the army wife life (she and her husband are in education); bitching and moaning. Talking and thinking out loud. It was in that conversation that I confirmed my own answer.

I moved to Germany with the fantasy of seeing all of Europe. Imagining it would be oh so wonderful to live in such a beautiful place. I could stroll cobblestones streets everyday. I could walk to a local bakery with a basket in my hand.
Rightttt? Hahaha....

While I've seen a lot of amazing things, and while Germany is beautiful, I hate living here.

I'm a 40 minute drive away from any type of city shopping. I live in the middle of cow country. I have went 2 years and 7 months without having the things that I love close by. 

We have taken loads of weekend trips to castle, cities, monuments. We have used up a lot of paid leave to visit other countries surrounding Germany. But every day life here is so redundant.

My sister said: "Think of the day trips to the beach! You're freaking crazy if you don't choose South Carolina! Charleston, Myrtle Beach, Columbia. So many possibilities."

She's right, but wrong.

The biggest lesson I've learned in Germany is that one should never move/uproot to somewhere based on the fantasy of what you plan to do every weekend. Because it really doesn't work like that if you have a real job, a family, and you aren't a billionaire. 

I live next to some of the world's most beautiful castles, yet I haven't seen them all. I adore Nuremberg, which is only an hour away, but I'm not there every single day. I live 2 hours away from Prague, but I've been there once.

Realistically, would I spend every weekend at the beach in South Carolina? No.

Every other weekend in Charleston? No.

Hell, I lived next to Seattle for five years and have only visited the downtown area three times. I lived near the Grand Canyon for 17 years, and only saw it once. 

I can't reason anymore with the idea of moving somewhere purely for travel possibilities.

I want our next duty station to be what I call "home happy". Sure, I plan to continue traveling, but I don't want to base our next place on the stuff there is to see around it. If I did that, it would mean I learned nothing from my OCONUS experience.

So, after making a list of Pros/Cons for each place, after comparing what there is to see, do eat, and shop in the actual area (10 miles or so) of each...

I chose to stick with Fort Riley, Kansas!

I never in my wildest dreams thought I would choose Kansas over my dream state to live in. But yeah, I did.

What it boiled down to was something simple; every day life. 

I want our every day life to be easier than it has been for the past two and a half plus years. If I want to go to Best Buy, Home Depot, Target or have grocery and craft store options, I don't want to have to drive longer than 20 minutes. Yes, Sumter, SC does have some alternative stores, but I miss having a variety of options. A Lowe's and Home Depot; a Walmart and Target. Sumter (Shaw AFB) can't offer that. Anything else is in Columbia or Florence; each about an hour away. I didn't want that, again. Sigh. It's a one city, one option kind of place.

So today, my husband is emailing the guy back to say "Thanks, but no thanks. We're taking our chances in Kansas."

My point of this post is to explain that if that one duty station you covet and dream of isn't available, you might find yourself falling in love with the idea of somewhere else. I even surprised myself!

And don't assume that anything is official in the army. I've met folks on orders whose orders changed WHILE in route to the original place. No joke. It's rare, but it does happen. 

I'm grateful that the guy remembered us after all, but maybe his being late to the orders party was a blessing in disguise.

But...oh heck yes I will be visiting the beaches of South Carolina in the future. Hoping for summer of 2018!

orders